Why do some public figures feel āoffā?
I spent time interrogating my unease with these 15 well-known voices and I hope my conclusions help you understand your own unease too.
They sound smart. They seem trustworthy. I like most of them. But something in my nervous system twitches when I hear them.
I think they are hiding a level of 'incoherence' or 'misalignment' behind their personas (like nearly all of us do!). This is not to cancel or tear down.
This is to bring clarity so you can finally trust what your gut is already telling you but can't quite say out loud.
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1. Jordan Peterson
āHe says what Iām thinking⦠but why does he sound like heās about to snap?ā
Whatās really happening: His words are sharp but his energy is chaotic. His voice carries grief, fear, rage...all tightly packed into a box I'd label 'controlled'. I donāt feel safe. I feel pulled in.
Why itās happening: Heās brilliant, but unintegrated. Still at war with chaos inside and out. His intellect got strong but his nervous system stayed fractured. So his message usually lands, but his body never does.
2. Sam Harris
āHe sounds calm⦠but why do I feel emotionally dehydrated after listening to him?ā
Whatās really happening: Samās logic seems pristine, but his presence is cold. Thereās no felt 'self' behind the words. Just control. His calm isnāt peace; itās absence.
Why itās happening: Sam built his identity on reason so emotion, ambiguity, and even awe must feel like threats to him. He didnāt conquer his ego, he just silenced it! And with it, the ability to feel.
3. BrenƩ Brown
āShe speaks so much about vulnerability⦠but why does it feel rehearsed and...invulnerable?ā
Whatās really happening: Her words invite me in. But her body doesnāt. Thereās tension under the TED talk tone. Her nervous system is performing openness, not inhabiting it!
Why itās happening: Brene built a brand on being 'real'. But the pressure to stay relatable must have made her package it. Her message says 'real' but the signal is braced and my body knows it. It doesn't believe her.
4. Oprah Winfrey
āShe feels warm and wise⦠but something in her always pulls back at the edge of real truth.āĀ
Whatās really happening: Oprah radiates presence until things get too raw. Then she pivots, comforts, reframes. The warmth is real. But itās filtered.
Why itās happening: She became Americaās emotional anchor and couldnāt afford to fall apart. She learned to manage truth in a way that kept everyone safe, including herself. Her weight struggles became part of the public narrative, and I say this as someone whoās done the same (explored my weight struggles on camera). But you can feel it: the glow is part healing⦠and part performance.
Like many of us, she got trapped playing the person she hoped to become (and ultimately found resolution in semaglutides - Ozempic etc).
5. Russell Brand
āHe sounds enlightened⦠but why does it feel like chaos dressed in poetry?ā
Whatās really happening: He speaks fluently about presence, ego death, higher self but his energy is frantic. Thereās no still point. His words expand, but never, ever settle.
Why itās happening: Russell replaced addiction with spiritual performance. I think he means it. But his nervous system is still sprinting. The mask now says āguruā instead of ācomedianā but itās still a mask!
6. Jay Shetty
āIt all sounds right⦠but why does it feel like a TED Talk married a shampoo ad?ā
Whatās really happening: His content is smooth, polished, predictable. The advice lands but it never lingers. You forget it the moment it ends.Ā
Why itās happening: Jay reverse-engineered wisdom into a content strategy. Itās all aesthetic, no weight. His brand isnāt false, it's just empty. Spiritual fast food: warm, digestible, forgettable!
7. Douglas Murray
āHeās making a brilliant point⦠but why does it feel like heās holding back a breakdown he doesnāt even know heās having?āĀ
Whatās really happening: He speaks about grief, loss, and the madness of the modern world with surgical clarity but you donāt feel it land. His voice is calm. His face is calm. But my body tenses up. Like heās walking me through the ruins of something he doesn't really care about anyway.
Why itās happening: He was trained to debate, not feel. Probably from a young age (UK boarding school). So now he channels emotion through eloquence instead of presence.
Itās not fake, itās just sealed with industrial grade sealer from Bunnings. His coherence is intellectual. His grief is managed. I hear the echo of someone who made himself too composed to collapse.
8. Simon Sinek
āItās motivating⦠but why do I feel like I just got pitched a leadership cult?ā
Whatās really happening: Simon simplifies everything into digestible frameworks. Which works until you try to live it. The ideas are clear. But the depth isnāt there.
Why itās happening: His gift is packaging insight into a frame, not embodying it. Wisdom turned into slogan. Sure, Start With fucking Why.
Brilliant. Valid. But does everything have to be a slogan or a framework?
9. James Lindsay
āHe makes sense but why do I feel like Iām being shouted at even when heās right?ā
Whatās really happening: James was once calmly brutal. Lately, heās just brutal. The coherence is fraying. The signal feels more like a siren now.
Why itās happening: He built himself as a watchdog for ideology. One of the most important voices I've ever heard. But now everything looks like a threat. Everything. And when thatās your frame, coherence collapses into combat. Even his nervous system seems tired of fighting.

āHeās calm. Heās kind. But why does it feel like heās not quite in the room?ā





Keanu Reeves

Whatās really happening: Keanu isnāt trying to win me over. He doesnāt sell insight. He doesnāt posture. His nervous system is slow, his tone is level. Nothing in him scrambles for my attention.
Why it works: Heās not performing peace. He IS at peace (unless you kill his dog!). I feel him not because heās loud, but because he doesnāt leak. No twitch. No pretend. No spin. Just a man whoās not running from himself.
āHe says wild stuff sometimes⦠but I never feel manipulated.āĀ
Whatās really happening: Joe doesnāt flinch. Heās grounded, open, and not trying to impress anyone. I might roll my eyes sometimes but my body never tenses. Thereās no trick in it. And he's real.Ā
Why it works: He built a life that matches his system. Sauna, elk, weirdos, DMT...itās all real for him. Heās not pretending to be deep, and that honesty, even if shallow, is a clean, cohered signal that puts me at ease.
Ā
Brett Weinstein
āEven when he's wrong or ludicrous (remember the bandana masks?)ā¦I never feel the need to armor up when he talks.ā
Whatās really happening: Brett brings steadiness. Even in tense territory. His thinking is complex but his tone is clear. No seduction. No scramble. Just a man doing the work out loud. The opposite of his brilliant brother Eric who makes me feel untethered.
Why it works: Heās coherent. Not because heās always right, but because heās not pretending to be more right than he is. Youāre not being pulled into his orbit. Youāre being invited to look where heās looking and make up your own mind.